There are times when I wish I had a butler. If I had a butler, I wouldn’t have to figure out how to pack for a month-long trip to Bologna, Amsterdam, Antwerp, Paris, Madrid, Barcelona, Lisbon, and Florida in suitcases small enough not to make me crazy on all those airplanes and trains, and, in fact, if I had a butler, he could come to the Boston airport the day I’m flying from Lisbon to Paris to Boston to Washington DC to Florida to take my professional Europe suitcase from me and hand me a freshly-packed suitcase for visiting babies in Florida.

I would like a butler named Grover. He could wear a cape and a helmet and be blue and fuzzy and cute and occasionally double as a waiter in a rather peculiar restaurant. Could we arrange for that, please?

I leave in a week and I’m going out of my mind and would like to warn y’all that things might be a little floopy on the blog for the foreseeable future. I plan to be blogging, but the blogging is apt to be a bit… indicative of insanity? Because I’m trying to do a million things this week while also keeping to my regular writing schedule, and that means there’s going to be some flailing.

*flails*

I’ll update my Appearance Schedule as I get new info, and as time allows. For now, I can report that on Friday, March 26, at 4:30 pm, at the Voltone del Podestà in Piazza Maggiore in Bologna’s city center, there will be a sword fight on my behalf. I mean, not in my defense or anything. No one will actually be trying to kill anyone. It will all be for show and my Italian publisher assures me that the swords will be harmless. :D? I can only say that if it’s anything like any of the other events De Agostini has organized for me, it’ll be FUN. More info here.

And now, let’s all take a deep breath and get some perspective.

Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhh…….

(I’m caramelizing some onions, so that deep breath smelled really good.)