Well… I don’t know; maybe a combination of mulishness, arrogance, and self-delusion? :o) All underrated qualities, IMO. More seriously, I keep it because I have to. I mean, what other option do I have? Giving up? Is that really an option? If I keep going, mightn’t the book fail? Yeah, it really might. But if I give up, there’s no longer any “might” about it — it will fail. Sorry, but that kind of failure seems to me like the least satisfying kind of failure. If my book fails, it will NOT be because I didn’t try hard enough. I’m not going down without a fight!
I get a little annoyed when I hear people talking about the inherent insecurity and low self-esteem of “the artist.” Art glows with faith even in its weakest parts. At every moment, writing is an act of self-confidence — the sheerest, most determined, most stubborn self-belief. You CAN have faith and doubt at the same time; the most insecure writer on the planet has faith that shines just as bright as her doubt, and she deserves props for that. It might be hidden deep, she might not feel it and you might not see it, but it’s in there, or she wouldn’t be able to write.
Give yourself permission to believe in something even as you doubt it — because you know what? I think it’s possible to believe something into being.
This blog is getting too serious. On Thursday, I promise DOMINOES!